What is the Pigeon Conspiracy?
Many people believe that pigeons are intent on world domination, and that they will stop at nothing to get their way. The Pigeon Conspiracy first came to light on the Internet, but rapidly spread to the international consciousness. more >>
Links of interest
The original Pigeon Conspiracy website - 191.40.90.1!
For a limited time only, PigeonConspiracy.com is hosting the original conspiracy website set up by the mysterious Richard Pierson. See it exactly as it was when the conspiracy first came to light. more >>
|
|
| |
<< back
Pigeon Resistance admits St. Mark's Massacre
|
VENICE - The Resistenza Italiana dei Piccioni (RIP) has claimed responsbility for the death of over 10,000 pigeons in Piazza San Marco. An midnight operation saw the RIP lay out crumbs laced with cyanide in an attempt to curb the massive population growth of pigeons in the picturesque Italian city.
The first reports of a problem began to filter in to city authorities as early morning garbage collectors entered the square and discovered thousands of dead and dying pigeons. A large banner marked with the phrase RIP had been left hanging from a building on the side of the square. This was initially assumed to represent 'Rest in Peace' but later established to be the calling card of the Resistenza Italiana dei Piccioni.
|
|
 |
|
| Piazza San Marco before the attack - pigeons and people in harmony |
|
 |
|
| The RIP banner hung from a building facing the square |
|
|
By mid-morning, in full view of shocked tourists outside a hastily-set up perimeter, sanitation workers dressed in biohazard suits were clearing away the pigeon carcasses. The admission from the RIP arrived via email at around 11h15 and was released to the press. It read (translated from Italian):
The Italian Pigeon Resistance hereby claims the first victory against the pigeons of Venice. Too long have these birds of calamity dominated St. Mark's Square, too long have they threatened the health and safety of the men, women and children of our city. Today we set back their apocalyptic plans, lay waste to their intention to destroy us. We stand up to fight and let them know that we will not go quietly.
City officials confirmed that since pigeons are not a protected species - in fact, they are classified as vermin - there is no legal recourse for the action taken by the RIP. "This is not punishable," explained health official Alberto Santi. "We can do nothing. They want to kill pigeons, they can. There is nothing to stop them."
In a press release on its English-language website, the Pigeon Resistance confirmed the admission made by its Italian branch.
Early this morning, our comrades the RIP took action against the pigeons of Venice by, in a humane manner, taking steps to start eliminating the pigeon pest problem that has long faced Piazza San Marco. We commend the RIP for its positive and proactive approach towards finding a solution for the Pigeon Conspiracy.
PigeonConspiracy.com expert analyst Martin Graves confirms that more of the same can be anticipated. "We can expect more mass exterminations to be undertaken by anti-pigeon groups. This won't be the last or the biggest by any means."
|
|
|
